Thursday, March 29, 2007
"Ang gwapo nya no?"
"Oo nga eh. Pero isa lang syang malaking pantasya."
"Na mahirap abutin."
"Na kailangan pa ng fairy godmother para magkaron ng katuparan."
"Ganon! Kaya pala kay X ka! Mas gettable ba?"
"Oo naman no. Kapal nya naman pag nagmaganda pa sya."
"Bakit hindi nya tayo pinapansin nung andun tayo?"
"Nakakatulala kasi ang kagandahan natin."
"Nakita ko yung likod ng kras mo. Parang profile ng karpintero."
10. May kras kasi ako.
9. Ano ba, di pa nga ko nagsusuklay eh. (Flip hair)
8. Ngayon mo lang napansin?
7. Shampoo lang yan.
6. I went back to the time when I can do whatever I want and I was free from all the shit other people keep on giving me.
5. (Giggle like a schoolgirl.)
4. Di katulad mo.
3. Since birth kaya?
2. I've always been like this.
...and the Number One appropriate response is...
1. I KNOW.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Things I Considered Adding to My List of Things to Do Before I Die, a.k.a. Things I Never Knew I Could Do:
Parasailing. We went island hopping on the first day, and after a production number of putting on sunscreen we found the parasailing guys. It was Hesika’s idea, and although I was afraid of heights I was game to be harnessed to the big chute. Wabbit will never do it, so she’s in charge of documenting the momentous event. I gave her my 350D with the 300mm lens on Sports mode, which should be fine. Hesika was hysterical with a capital H, the operator was just getting us to sit on the platform of the speedboat for launching, but she was screaming like a pig already. Fine, my knees were also shaking, but I’m not a big fan of screaming – it spends a lot of energy that can be useful for trying to save your butt in case things go wrong. When we started going up though, I screamed along. It was exhilarating and liberating, being up there a hundred feet with just a rope tying the two of us to the boat. Sometimes the guys would slow down so we get wet, then up again we go. The whole time Hesika was still screaming, but I managed to tune her out. She takes a break from the caterwauling when she chokes on her own saliva, then off she goes again. When she tires out we exchange a few words about how great the view is, wave to Wabbit and the camera, make faces for posterity and once the what-if-the-rope-breaks topic was brought up. Then the 15 minutes were up, and we were pulled to the boat again. I was shaking from the adrenalin rush but happy. Then the guys let us drive their speedboat around for a while, because they were so in love with Wabbit.
Snorkeling with a Stranger. We rented out vests and snorkeling equipment, to be shared among us. But I had two paraplegics with me when it comes to water, they don’t like the water level above their waistlines. I also didn’t want to venture very far out, I’m not very confident in deep waters. So when the lifeguard suggested I go way over there (where? There.) I said I was scared, but told him I will go if he will come with me. (“I’ll follow you.” “No, you hold my hand.”) So there we were, holding hands while snorkeling. He even gave me a blue starfish. The only thing that sent me panicking was when he dove for a sea cucumber and insisted I touch it. It looked like a giant slug that was so gross. I was shaking my head underwater but he kept giving the slug to me, but I know I can’t scream so I just trashed around. I wanted to bonk him on the head but I was counting on him to bring me back to shore (we were so far out I can’t see the two paraplegics), and I can’t swim properly because I was still holding the stupid starfish. He was nice though, his name is Harry.
Dripping Wet While Fully Clothed. It rained very hard on our way back from the island, and I discovered that a speedboat going 30 mph in the rain is not a very fun thing to do. It was like a thousand needles puncturing our skins, not to mention the waves that kept slapping our backs. We shouldn't have changed from our bathingsuits. I was worried that my cameras would get wet, fortunately the camera bag was all-weather. My giant cheap orange bag turned out to be waterproof too, as Hershey was very dry inside. Wabbit's passport wasn't able to survive though. We looked so pathetic ordering coffee from a stall to warm up, I was wringing out water from my shirt and the locals were finding it very funny. We were supposed to go to my friend's place about four blocks away from the harbor, and it hadn't stopped raining so we went to a supermarket to beg for plastic bags for our stuff. We walked in the rain, stepped on puddles, my nose and chin dripping. It wasn't romantic at all. When my friend saw us he was all "WTF happened to you guys?" He lent us towels so we were able to change into dry clothes, then he sent us to have dinner and called us a cab.
The whitewater rafting deserves a full entry on its own, so let me get back to you on that.
Monday, March 26, 2007
‘Wag kang maniwala d’yan.
‘Di ka n’ya mahal talaga
Sayang lang ang buhay mo kung mapupunta ka lang sa kanya
Iiwanan ka lang n’yan, mag-ingat ka
Dagdag ka lamang sa milyun-milyong babae n’ya
Akin ka na lang (akin ka na lang)
Iingatan ko ang puso mo
Akin ka na lang (akin ka na lang)
Wala nang hihigit pa sa ‘yo
‘Di naman ako bolero katulad ng ibang tao
Ang totoo’y pag nandyan ka medyo nabubulol pa nga ako
Malangis lang ang dila n’yan, ‘wag kang madala
Dahan-dahan ka lang, baka pati ika’y mabiktima
(’Wag naman sana)
‘Di naman sa sinisiraan ko ang pangit na ‘yan
‘Wag ka dapat sa’kin magduda, hinding-hindi kita pababayaan!
Akin ka na lang
Liligaya ka sa pag-ibig ko
Akin ka na lang
At wala nang hihigit pa sa ‘yo
Wala nang hihigit pa sa ‘yo (akin ka na lang)
Saturday, March 24, 2007
I like to travel. The experience of going to an unfamiliar place, imbibing the culture, and meeting new people can be priceless. Sure, you have to fork out a considerable amount of money to be able to jump on a plane and even "cheap" is relative, but what you get from it and what you become after you see the world is something you will always cherish.
I had been looking forward to this trip for months; we had been on a buying frenzy for cheap tickets, and this is the first of many scheduled trips. Still have a lot of unused e-tickets on my inbox. We may be domestic dorks, but one of our many talents will still be spotting bargain travel packages.
We did a lot of things, fun fun things. It was a running joke among us that our planets clash, causing disaster to happen whenever we're together. True, there's always (and I mean 5 times a day) something happening to stop our hearts for a moment or send our heartbeats do a double time, but we could always laugh about it afterwards while telling stories to friends.
We haven't even been on foreign ground for a minute (literally, the plane just touched down) when we decided to take our picture with the plane at the background. Suddenly an airline crew was running towards us, shouting "No picture! No picture!" with a security person on tow. I thought they were going to throw a net at us, or handcuff us at least and detain us at the Immigration Office. Hence our faces on the said picture, looking bewildered but smiling. They didn't do anything to us, they let us in and our passports got stamped. (Trivia: the person who stamped our entry was the same one who stamped our exit.)
There was no trouble getting a cab to take us to our hotel, the people were very helpful and nice, although the smiling faltered a little when we said we didn't have money. The smiles returned when I added "yet", and they offered to take us to a money changer place at a different part of the airport. The cab driver was a sweet old man, he tried to make conversation with the little English he possesses, and we were up for it. He enjoyed our giggly selves and told us our hotel was far. The website said 15 minutes from the airport, so it might not be that far. We have been traveling for 15 minutes already and I was getting bored, but perked up when I spotted a sign, the name of the hotel and an arrow. That said 10km. What? Ten kilometers from the exit? That hotel better be good, dammit.
...To be continued. I'm tired and I still have to burn files to CDs.
Friday, March 23, 2007
Did I mention that majority of those 600 something photos consists of our faces? So the ones you will see are just those attempts at producing something worthy of an expensive camera (yes, I got a new Canon 350D and it sleeps beside me and his name is Ken).
Sorry, but the personal pictures and videos I posted are for contacts only. You might not be interested anyway, a friend told me we were always grinning like we were up to something, or have done something really naughty. Not really, because most of the time the punchline was us.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
You see, I'm not a very crush-y person. I will be attracted to one person but I will not lie awake at night thinking about him, or daydream about him too much that I will forget to pay my fare. Yes, it's tacky but I'm only human.
The thing is, I haven't had a crush since I was in college. That was understandable then, my hormones were still stabilizing to a manageable level. But now that I'm thirty, it's weird. Horrible weird. Especially when I only saw the person once, and more especially when I can't even recall his face. I had to pull out pictures if I want to get a start on visualizing our first date.
It doesn't help that he's texting me.
I think it's the mouthful of river water that I swallowed. Here's a video of us whitewater rafting. I'm there somewhere. Pardon the quality, I shot the TV screen while the DVD was playing.
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
They should really rename it Potato Selection.
Potatoes aside, the food was good. The lamb was falling off in chunks, and the paella was as good as I remembered it. Nomad and I had dinner there a long time ago, he was depressed and I was hungry, so we ordered the paella. "For two, sir" was an exaggeration, or understatement. It was good for four people already.
The highlight of the lunch was this guy, a surfer guy from the land of grenouilles et Eiffel. He dominated the conversation, telling stories about his travels and all sorts, while flipping his longish hair away from his face and sometimes tucking it behind his ear. I quietly nod and smile and say something interesting once in a while, but if we were in a comic strip my thought balloon would have said "Can you stop talking for a minute, hold that pose, and let me just look at you for one solid hour. You're so pretty."
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
She said I'm bringing way too much stuff, it won't fit in my suitcase. Look, she even had to lie on top of it to make everything fit. I think she just worries that there's no room for her anymore.
Monday, March 12, 2007
So, subscribe. Please?
So I used my good grades to get a good job with good pay, now I don't have to do anything, I just send yaya over to do my bidding. But there are some things yaya can't do properly, like fix seams. I may be too lazy to do it, but I can wield a needle and thread. I picked up the clothing in question and started to stitch away, while Sex and the City was on. I was proud of my achievement, it was hemmed neatly. Then I picked it up to fold it, and I can't -- I stitched myself with it. Yes, the thing I was fixing was now attached to my pajamas.
It was one of the high moments of my dorkness, along with calling my roommate (who's out partying) to find out if she might know where the cutting board is (we were between yayas).
"Saan ka? Party? Alam mo kaya kung nasaan yung cutting board natin?"
"For example lang, kunyari ha, may dustpan tayo...san mo sya ilalagay?"
"Manang, pabili ng kangkong."
"Wala kaming kangkong ngayon eh."
"Eh ano ho tawag nyo dyan?"
"Talbos ng kamote."
"Ah. Pwede po ba yan sa sinigang?"
"Ang sarap ng tinola. Ano tawag dun sa dahon na kinain ko?"
"Baka dahon ng papaya."
"Paano nangyayari ang dinuguan?"
"Pare kahit for 1 million dollars yan, di ko masasagot."
"Tingin mo luto na 'tong pasta?"
"Malamang. Unat na yung spiral eh."
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Music: Voices Inside my Head
Location: Inside a womb made of egg cartons
I have an impending migraine. Like the rising sun, it’s on the horizon giving the sky a pink tinge. It’s starting to push against my brain, forcing my eyes to tear up and my mouth to open in a perpetual state of yawn.
I have fought against it the moment I woke up, through the horror of locating a missing file, the tediousness of eating lunch, the negotiating of a hotel room in Dubai, and now listening to national KM innovations of the Asia and the Pacific.
Right now I cannot bring myself to listen why India had won the MAKE Global Award. All I want to do is close my eyes and lose consciousness. There is a reason why people need a complete eight-hour sleep. There’s only one way to keep myself from falling asleep: participate in the discussion. So I did, and made the impression that I was listening and had some wisdom to impart.
Mental Note: check out Google Docs for collaborative work. Which is two years too late, because I have long forgotten group meetings, with the objective of coming up with a common point of view. Not when your groupmates are cut-and-paste addicts, or being too much of a lazy ass to actually do the effort of segueing the current paragraph to the next.
I still don’t get why we keep comparing the Philippines to other countries during class, I don’t feel good when we always come out as kulelat. It’s hard to swallow the fact that the stinky Indians (not being racist here, they DO stink, most of them anyway) are very much ahead of us, even when their illegal immigrants here are hawking palangganas to our daily wage earners.
PROF: Your pen is nice ha, where did you get it?
STUPIDENT: Sir, NENOK sa office. Dalhan ko kayo?
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Saturday, March 03, 2007
I bought a decaf mocha latte to warm up but my clumsy genes chose to kick in at that moment, when I had just put the cup on the tray uncovered, piping hot. It turned over, whipped cream and all, spilling on the tray and on my Cartunistas. I haven't even had one sip (and ohmigod it's so cold here outside) and there it was on the floor. Fuck fuck fuck.
Back to the movie (this is turning out to be such a fine piece of literature). Jim Carrey is Walter Sparrow, who rounds up stray animals for a living. One day, Nasty Evil Dog entered his life using number 23 as his excuse to annoy Walter to the point of paranoia. And then, coincedentally, a mysterious small, red, thin book with the title The Number 23 was given to him by his wife on his birthday, which was February 3 (2/3).
He becomes obsessed with the story, and consequently the number 23, that he unlocks his hidden memory. You know what, I'll stop. I suck, the movie sucks, Gloria Jean's trays suck. All I can say is that reading a small, red, thin book wouldn't have taken a normal person several days to finish. Judging from the thickness and the font used (Courier 12 or some other typewriter font) I would have finished it in two days, tops. People don't also voluntarily sneak inside abandoned asylums and not scream when bats fly at their faces. People don't investigate secret rooms with candles still burning and scribbles on the walls. Especially if you find your name followed by "kill her" on your husband's arm.
What the hell, it's starting to rain and I'm cold and without a coffee.
I think sometimes that masochism is a basic need, that when it's not hurting I would think that I'm not doing it properly. I'm as happy as the next person to get away so easily and scratch-free, but deep inside me there's that nagging feeling that if I'm not struggling to make it then something's wrong.
I have flitted (yes, flitted) through my studies, thinking is it the system or is it me or was it all really just easy for everybody? Even though I bitched and whined, hemmed and hawed, looking back it was not that difficult to get through. At this deluded state, I'm already thinking of taking up another degree, maybe Urban Planning or Development Communications.
Somebody stop me.
Friday, March 02, 2007
What does the color pink make you think of?
Sugar and spice and everything nice.
Name something you thought you had lost, but later found.
My sanity, common sense, and independence. God, how I missed it.
In 3 words, describe this past week.
Kill me now.
What are you obsessed with?
Oooohhhh…this is going to be a long one. The first obsession I ever had were Barbie dolls when I was 8 or 9, I think. I even dreamed about having this whole community of big-breasted small-waisted freakos with a frozen smile and great hair. I wanted the Barbie car, the lounge chair, the dresser, and the mother of all Barbie accessories, the dollhouse. I never got most of it, of course.
What kind of perfume or cologne do you like to wear?
Thursday, March 01, 2007
I work as a recruitment associate for call centers, and i often encounter funny lines. hey, i'm not laughing at the people. just the lines. here are some of them:
1. I am a flexible and I am perseverance person (when asked to describe her personality)
2. I want to learn more English words. (when asked why he wanted to work in a call center). [Damn! Read the dictionary!]
3. Do you have any extra ordinary positions that I can take for granted (Roughly Translated: Meron po ba kayong ibang position na pwede ko'ng apply-an?)
4. "Ten" (When asked to count from 1 to 40 to measure her articulation)
5. "Kelan Po?" (When asked to count from 1 to 40 to measure her articulation)
6. "I would choose IRATE CALLERS, Sir." (Answer to the question: If you will change the COLOR of the world, what would it be and why?)
7. "I want to entertain and satisfy customers" (hmmm….interesting concept…so…what are you wearing right now?)
8. "I want to expose myself to the customers." (Answer to why he wants to work in a call center") – Flasher ITO!
9. "Is there an opening for a call center?" (Oh so you want to become a call center now huh?)
10. "Hi. Good afternoon, my name is _____, and I'M a call center from the Philippines." (solohin ba)
11. Chocolates, boys with tongue pierce." (An applicants answer to the question: What are your weaknesses?"
12. "I think Grade 3 and 4 students are very childish!" (Answer to the question: What do you think is the most difficult part of teaching Grade 3 and 4 students)
13. "Haller???!!! ??? (knocks on the table) THE SALARY!" (Answer to Why do you want to work in a call center?)
14. "I'm a married person, I have 2 children, the same boy"
15. "It's a colorful world." (Describe the shirt you're wearing.)
16. "It's a boomed industry." (So all agents are now dead, I guess)
17. "I like to explore other people." (ay sus…maniac ka ano?)
18. "I want to explore myself more." (Answer to why do you want to work in a call center. bagay sila ni #17...)
19. "Hu u? How did you get my #? Text me back, huri. Send me load." (The audacity of an applicant can sometimes appall you.)
20. "I was scheduled for an exam this morning….I wasn't able to make it…because I WAS TONSILITIS."
21. "Hi Maam, do you have an opening." (Lokong to ah!)
22. "I want to adventure into the graveyard…" (Langya, mahiilig ka sa patay!)
23. "I would like to be a part of the graveyard…" (isa ka pa...thriller… thriller night)
24. "Gd pm sir, im realy sri wen u call me I cnt hear clearly coz d raindrops of d rain is vry noisy. Rgrdng of wat u want 2 knw y u call me?" (A text message from an applicant)
25. "Do you accept walking applicants?" (No, we prefer flying ones)
26. Interviewer: So you're an undergrad. What year are you in right now? Applicant: Oh I'm just here in the house. Interviewer: No, I asked you what year you're in. Applicant: Year? I'm 25 years old! ( Nagkakaintindihan tayo pare...)
27. Applicant: Agency ba to? Interviewer: No sir, head hunting firm. Applicant (turning to friend): Egg-hunting daw pare! (Happy Easter!)
28. "In the middle of my study at Adamson, my father fortunately passed away." (FORTUNATELY? ??!!!)
29. "Hello, i just want to inquire about the application resume that i planted in the computer..." (Ano ka, farmer?)
30. "May inaantay ako na trabaho kaya gusto ko lang na may mapag LILIBINGAN." (Answer to the question "Why do you prefer a part-time job?" Tagalog na yun ha! Mahilig talaga kayo sa patay!)