Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Over Lunch

“So what did you do for lunch?”

“We had a focus group discussion on the Kris-James-Hope issue, that if you strip it of the celebrity factor it’s just an everyday occurrence, and that Kris should have never married somebody so out of her league, that they’re not on the same level in any way, intellectually, emotionally, and social standing. That being 10 years her junior, does she really expect him to settle down, and what more of the “I lab you beri mats” and her being a Dean’s lister in Ateneo, what do they talk about? Not being discriminating here, but really, isn’t communication a very big part of a relationship, notwithstanding that Kris grew up in a very different world than what James is used to. And Hope, well what can we say, she knew what she was entering into and she should face the consequences, and do you know that they’re even showing the cubicle where they allegedly did the dirty? And oh yeah, that we wanted to bash Tito Sotto’s face in when he made his teary-eyed farewell speech in Eat Bulaga, and that Richard Gomez running for senator is the peaking of his acid trip, and it’s good that Manny Pacquiao has backed out of the congressional race, because dear God, what would a battered brain (literally) do in Congress anyway? And the political ads are an insult to the principles of media, because look at what they’re showing us, Manny Villar dancing and Itanim ang Pichay. Do they not cringe when they watch their own ads?”

“You know, just saying you went out with your friends would be enough.”

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Experiment

They say that plants respond when you talk to them. Well, I have here an ugly ass indoor plant that I want to chuck out, but the gardener won't take it or give it away because it's "accountable" to this area. Damn ISO 9000 series. Anyway, I'm planning to insult it to death, literally. Let's see if it will work.

Hee. I'm evil. Here's a pic of the plant.


And if you're about to flame me for wanting to kill a plant, hey, go put up a foundation or something. It's not like I'm uprooting it or putting poison in its water.

Friday, February 23, 2007

Yummy Yummy Yummy There's Love in my Tummy


Thursday, February 22, 2007

I Am the Apocalypse of Cab Drivers

Last night, I took a cab as usual from the MRT station. The traffic was a little heavier than usual, but not that bad. The ride was uneventful, I was comfortable, and The Best of Basil Valdez was on repeat. The driver was even singing along to most of the songs, and boy does he know the words to Kastilyong Buhangin.

When we got to my place I handed him a 200 peso bill. I told him to take a ten peso tip on top of the total fare. He told me if I can add more, because the traffic was bad. I was beginning to be irritated but I figured he must need the 20 (that's what I thought) more than I did, so I said fine. When he handed me the change he took thirty bucks on top of it.

So the war began.

"Manong, bigyan mo pa ko ng ten, masyado namang malaki ang dagdag ko."
"Sige na miss, traffic naman eh."
"Hindi naman ganun ka-traffic ah. Akin na yung ten."
"Tip mo na lang."
"Twenty pesos na nga ang dinagdag ko eh."
"Miss, bumaba ka na lang, bago ko mainis."

That really did it for me.

"Aba! ikaw pa maiinis eh ako na nga kinokotongan mo! Isoli mo lahat ng dinagdag ko!"
"Miss..."

I didn't let him finish. I got out my Swiss knife, took out the blade and aimed for the car upholstery.

"Sige, manglamang ka pa, sisirain ko talaga ang upuan mo."

I don't know what happened next, but he threw me a fifty and I got out of the cab. He was saying something like "I know where you live" but you know me, I don't get scared of statements like that. I turned to our resident tambays (they were big men) and said, "Tandaan nyo plate number nyan ha, manloloko yan, pag dumaan yan dito basagin nyo headlights."

And that was all the cab driver needed. He stepped on it like Death was breathing down his neck.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

For Sale


Ok, I'm finally letting go of my first SLR camera (how dear it is to me). It's a Canon Rebel Ti, bought in the US in 2003. I'm kinda sad to let it go, we have gone to so many places together, as evidenced by the flood of pictures taken, from Palawan (I & II), Bohol, Ilocos, Quezon province, city tours, Corregidor, Puerto Galera, Hongkong, Pangasinan...and the list goes on.

It comes with the kit lens (EF 28-90 4.0-5.6), manuals, original neck strap, and UV filter. Sorry, no box, we had to take it out so we don't get taxed. Email me at redjeulle@yahoo.com if interested.
And by the way, his name is Robin.

Friday, February 16, 2007

Backdated and Bored

Here's something I wrote on the eve of the big day.

10 February 2007, 2:30 a.m.

I’m supposed to be panic reading by now, since this is my last chance to imbibe some intelligent information about national innovation systems and technology development plans.

But of course here I am distracting myself with several things, like giving Maki a much needed bath, scrubbing my grubby keyboard sleeve, trying to recall my Airborne Access password because I lost the card, binge-drinking Nescafe 3-in-1, and imagining what it’s like to have Dennis Trillo at my beck and call.

And it’s not like the road will be easier after this, I have a 10-page paper to complete and I still don’t know squat about technology assessment or the impact of anything, except that pack of cards that fell on my head, goshdarnit. I definitely felt that one.

I also have a presentation to do in the coming days about something called communities of practice, and I will have a special place in heaven if I even manage to define that one. Note to kids: please don’t be like me when you’re studying, this is not good. Not at all. Listen to your parents about stuff such as paying attention to your teacher, taking notes, reading your textbooks, and actually understanding them. Believe me, it will save your ass big time come judgment day.

I am past the stage of being scared to death how I will actually do in this one, right now the word we’re looking for is apathetic. I don’t care anymore. As it is my special gift to detach myself from things and emotions, I have used it in this occasion. It’s just so tiring to read and worry at the same time. I made the necessary effort to be prepared, but if it’s not enough, well then fuckit-i-give-the-world-the-finger. I’ll do it again, I have no shame like that.

Don’t get me wrong, of course I still want to do well. I use the word “well” very very loosely; I am not aiming for a High Pass mark – give me Pass and I’ll throw a party. (Hey you, friend who lit a candle for me in Manaoag, you’re invited.) I have always said that I have confidence in myself, because that confidence was built upon the foundation of calculated risks. I look for opportunities that fit my capabilities, and BHAGs (Big, Hairy, Audacious Goals) are normally for very special situations only (i.e. being Dennis Trillo’s valentine date).

PS: How is it that a tube of cleaning agent the size of Mighty Bond specially made for white Macs cost PhP1,700? Not everybody who owns a Mac is filthy rich. That’s already two pairs of Havaianas. Priorities, people.

One of Life's Big Mysteries

While driving around UP one Saturday afternoon.

"Bakit kaya nila to tinawag na Shrunken Garden?"

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Valentine Shit

After dinner we sat at a coffee shop, drinking our caramel lattes at 11 p.m. to wash out the taste of bagoong rice, and suddenly I got a text message. It was from my sister, greeting me a happy valentine.

“In life, God doesn’t give you the people you want, instead He gives you the people you need. To teach you, to hurt you, to love you and to make you exactly the way you should be. Happy heart’s day ate!”

I don’t know why, I swear to God, but my throat tightened and hot tears made its way out. My companion started to freak out, males can't handle it with dignity. The last time I cried was maybe five months ago, and until now I didn’t feel the need for waterworks. I don’t know if it was the shitty quote or the heartfelt greeting I felt from my sister, or even Nina caterwauling “Through the Fire” in the background, I felt touched and sad and nostalgic and happy with who I am right now, all at the same time.

When chapters of my life come to an end, I am very good at detaching myself emotionally from it. Sure, I’ll cry and mourn the passing of an era for a bit but generally I survive unscathed. I move on to the next phase, which is getting on with my life. People around me keep asking why am I ok, why am I not downing three beers at the same time while a tub of ice cream sits on my lap. I don’t see the point of self-destruction, what would be left of me if even I deserted myself? Indeed, even after everything that has happened, I realized how lucky I was. Lucky to dodge a deadly bullet, to escape a life doomed to be one big motherfucking cliché. I am many things, but I avoid clichés like a tub full of worms.

I see every bad situation as something with a silver lining, however hurt I may emerge from it. I am from the everything-happens-for-a-reason school, that whatever that reason was it is for my own good. From my parents’ separation, to losing Andrei, I accepted wholeheartedly that it happened for a purpose, as part of a much bigger plan God had intended for me. It does not mean that I don’t get battle scars, but that’s all it is – battle scars. Something I can show my grandchildren when I’m 90 and senile.

And as yesterday was February 14th, happy birthday Andrei! I had so much planned for you, but I guess you were never really for me. God, I am so gonna cry again.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Intelektwal

Haven't been able to conjure up something so...technical lately for the TM Definition blog. Here's my latest. Sorry, Tivo. But hey, I really thought about that entry.

In Honor of This Wretched Day

An old favorite.

you are the...
apple of my eye,
mango of my pie,
palaman of my tinapay,
teeth of my suklay,
fingers on my kamay,
blood in my atay,
bubbles of my laway,
sala of my bahay,
foundation of my tulay,
seeds of my palay,
clothes in my ukay-ukay,
calcium in my kalansay,
calamansi on my siomai,
inay of my tatay,
knot on my tie,
toyo on my kuchay,
vitamins in my gulay,
airplane of my Cathay,
stars of my sky,
hammer of my panday,
sand of my Boracay,
sultan of my Brunei,
highlands of my Tagaytay,
mole on my Ate Guy,
baba of my Ai-Ai,
voice of my Inday Garutay,
spinach of my Popeye,
sizzle when I fry,
wind when I paypay,
tungkod when I'm pilay,
feeling when I'm high,
shoulder when I cry,
wings when I fly,
prize when I vie,
cure to my "ARAY!",
answer to my "WHY?",
truth behind my lie,
the life after I die...
In short, you're the center of my buhay.

Monday, February 12, 2007

It Has Come to Pass

After months of nail-biting and agonizing, we have finally taken the dreaded test. It was six hours of clacking away at the keyboard, after which my classmates and I stood around, dazed. I really don't see the point in talking about the questions and our answers, since it's all moot because the answer sheets were already signed and sealed.

(We had to answer questions like this, but not exactly:
Develop a framework (in diagram form) showing that technological innovation is a result of complex interactions of factors affecting an organization. Bear in mind both the internal and external environment of the enterprise. Explain your framework thoroughly.)

Besides, if they keep talking about their answers I tend to become defensive about my own. The test may be over but the bigger question is will we make it? It's a heavier feeling than the anticipation of taking the exam, the latter induces a sort of excitement mixed with dread, while the pain of waiting for the results is only dread, like something heavy on top of your chest.

I have done my best and that was it. I hope I pass (so I can finally graduate), but for the meantime there are the more urgent things waiting, like presentations and 12-page reports. I am so NOT looking forward to it.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

I'm Off

To my four readers, I might not post anything until next week, hence the flurry of new entries. I just have to do this one important thing that's been looming at me for quite a while now. The time has come to bite the dust. I have to get this over with, now. If I don't get it the first time, then there's always the next. At least I tried, and I have been brave.

In the meantime, please enjoy what I've left to tide you over. Please do visit my other sites (Red Gallery, Multiply, and TMDefinition), in case your curiosity isn't satisfied by this blog (yes, you, I'm talking to you). When summer comes I'll be a more sane person, I promise.

PS: How would you feel if somebody who appears to hate you so much suddenly adopts your point of view as their own? Ang galing ko naman! Thanks for the flattery. :-)

I Knew It

Your Blog Should Be Purple

You're an expressive, offbeat blogger who tends to write about anything and everything.
You tend to set blogging trends, and you're the most likely to write your own meme or survey.
You are a bit distant though. Your blog is all about you - not what anyone else has to say.

Hear Ye! Hear Ye!

Please check out the Red Gallery, after almost a year I've posted new pictures. Love that LRT shot. I'm hoping to make it more regular (like one picture a day, but after Compre).

And, and, and...

Happy birthday Bridget! ...alam mo na yun. :-)

On a sadder note, Dylan's mom passed away yesterday. Let's pray for the repose of her soul.

Happy Things

Blue sky.
Big, white clouds.
Cotton candies.
Gingerbread houses.
Hello Kitty.
The Hundred-Acre Woods.
Piglet.
Babies and kids.
Havaianas.
Shopping.
Holding hands.
The beach on a sunny day.
My camera.
Maki.
Mocha frappuccinos.
Sunset.
Princesses and fairy tales.
French fries and strawberry milkshakes.
Hugs.
Cuppycake song.
Friends.
Abbey.
Puppies and kittens.
Holidays.
Rainy days and comforters.
New shoes.

Please, I need an overload of cuteness and smoosh and cheesy Kodak moments. I just watched Salo last night (R.O., you should have warned me about that one), and although I fast forwarded some scenes they are still imprinted on my brain. I had to watch three episodes of Winnie the Pooh just to wash out the unpleasant.

Monday, February 05, 2007

Finding Myself Somewhere I Don't Belong

After being dropped off at the corner of EDSA and Quezon Avenue, I walked on slowly, hoping to catch a cab. A screaming "OPEN" sign caught my eye, pointing to the Manila Seedling entrance. I walked over, a little nostalgic about my last trip there. Turned out the sign was not exactly true, there was a big padlock on the gate just below the sign.

So I walked on, although a little disappointed that my nostalgic trip was not pushing through. After a few yards I saw another sign, something about an event. It did not register immediately, because I was still pondering about what happened to that Venus flytrap we got. Did it die? I forgot. I turned right, with my laptop weighing a ton and five grams on my back, perhaps a little sign that I'm not supposed to go where I'm going.

I went in, saw Davao pomelos on sale, and more importantly, bathrooms. The bottomless iced tea at Chocolate Kiss was making its presence felt already. I went inside the bathroom, expecting to be alone and worse, see a ghost or something. But there were old ladies everywhere, exclaiming about the orchids they got. Am I in a parallel universe?

I found out a few minutes later that there indeed was an event, hosted by the Horticultural Society of the Philippines. A left turn revealed a whole street of plant vendors, with flowering plants and cacti and hangers and ferns and all sorts of greens. Me, I'm not too keen on gardening, everything I touch withers up and die.

The only living thing that grew up on my plot in grade school was weed, and when I watered my mother's orchids they all died. Fortune plants meet their misfortune with me, I don't know how I can kill them since all they apparently need was water, right? Wrong. I don't know what else, because I managed to dry up two perfectly healthy stalks.

But the stalls were all nice and dandy, I decided to get some cheap plants. A cactus, since it doesn't really need VIP treatment; a potted mum, it's cheap so I don't have to cry much when it finally takes its own life; and a sweet basil plant, because it's so fragrant and healthy-looking.

I was busy taking pictures of the beautiful flowers, some of which you can see here, when a girl called me. I thought it's not allowed to take pictures, so I was ready to put on my innocent face. Turned out the girl is from my province, we went to the same school. We chatted a bit, she was manning an orchid booth from Bacolod City. Aside from the usual "Do you still see whatsisface?" she taught me a bit about plants, that there are called annuals (flowers once a year) and perennials (all-year round, much like your whining), and some of the plants being sold there would not actually last because they came from the mountains and the climate is different in Manila.

She also foretold the future of my purchases, saying my mums would last two weeks, tops. That means by tomorrow its dead, being under my care. The basil was ok, just don't water it much. The cactus, well, she said if I manage to kill it let her know.






Destiny

"Mag-aapply akong Valentine date ni Dennis Trillo. Ako talaga yung dine-describe nya eh."
"Weh? Sinabi nya na pilosopo, sarcastic, mahilig sa swelas ng chuvaianas at nagtuturok ng tubig kanal? idontthinkso."

Friday, February 02, 2007

The Little English Misses

Friday's Feast 129

Appetizer
What was one of the fashion fads when you were a teenager?
The Smokey Mountain look. The more you look like a hobo, the cooler you are. I remember ripping perfectly ok jeans, cutting up shirts, even sneakers. Sneakers should be dirty, washing them was a crime. I even put plaster strips on my sneakers.

Soup
Name one thing you think people assume about you when they first meet you.
That I'm a snob, because I don't smile much.

Salad
On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being highest, how hard do you work?
My work is seasonal, if there's much work then it's really work for me. On downtimes there's not much stress. But on busy days I stay really late, my current record is 1 a.m.

Main Course
If you were given a free 30-second commercial during the Super Bowl to sell anything you currently own, what would you advertise?
My Canon 300V SLR. Can somebody please buy it so I can buy a 350D? Text/email me, price is negotiable.

Dessert
Fill in the blank: I love to ________ when it is _________.
I love to sleep when it's raining. Bed weather. :-)

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Number Two is Here!

...and I'm sick.

I can't wait for the cold drafts to go away, for the semester to be over, and for the summer to begin. I don't like the cold, it makes my lips chap and my fingers blue, and I get blotches on my arms and legs. And I get sick all the time.